Chinsinsi cha chisangalalo ndikusamalira ena ndikuwasangalatsa, ofufuza afotokozera. Kuthandiza ena kumathandiza kukwaniritsa kufunika kolumikizana ndi anthu komanso kumakulitsa kudzidalira. Chochititsa chidwi n'chakuti, sikofunikira kuti chinthu chosamalira chikhale chosangalala - ndikofunika kwambiri kuti munthuyo akhulupirire kuti akuchita zabwino. Kaŵirikaŵiri chimwemwe chimatchedwa kumva kukhutiritsidwa kwa mkati mwa moyo wa munthu. Nthawi zambiri chikhalidwechi chikuwoneka chifukwa cha kukwaniritsa zolinga zaumwini, kukwaniritsa zosowa zawo. Muzochita, komabe, zimakhala kuti anthu opambana omwe azindikira maloto awo sakhala osangalala nthawi zonse.
Kafukufuku wochulukirapo akuwonetsa kuti gwero la chisangalalo likhoza kubisika kwina - monga kupatsa chisangalalo kwa ena. Akatswiri ofufuza a ku yunivesite ya Missouri ku United States ndiponso ku Sukulu Yapamwamba ya Zachuma ku Russia afika pa mfundo zimenezi. Amalankhula za izi mwatsatanetsatane m'nkhani ya Journal of Positive Psychology. Asayansi apanga zoyeserera zisanu zomwe zidapangidwa kuti zimveketse zomwe zimapangitsa anthu kukhala osangalala - kudzisamalira, kusamalira ena kapena wina woti aziwasamalira. Pa gawo lililonse la kafukufukuyu, ochita kafukufuku adasankha anthu odzipereka a 100-200, makamaka ophunzira. Neurotics amakonda kachasu, anthu mwayi - mowa. Kodi kusankha mowa kumati chiyani za munthu? Pakuyesa koyamba, ophunzira adayenera kukumbukira pamene adachita chinachake kuti adzisangalatse okha kapena ena. Anthu atafunsidwa kuti afotokoze mmene ankamvera pa nthawiyo, anaona kuti ankakonda kusangalatsa ena kuposa kudzipangitsa kukhala osangalala. Mu gawo lachiwiri, ochita kafukufuku adayesa kutulutsa zotsatira mu nthawi yeniyeni ndipo adapempha ophunzira kuti azichita zinthu zokondweretsa okha kapena kwa wina, kapena kungocheza ndi bwenzi. Awo amene anapatsidwa ntchito yokondweretsa wokondedwa wawo anasonyeza chikhutiro chokulirapo kuposa magulu ena aŵiriwo. Choncho, ochita kafukufukuwo adalongosola, makamaka, kuti sikungokhudzana ndi kukhudzana ndi munthu wina, koma za kumusamalira - mwinamwake, ndi kulankhulana kosavuta kumamupangitsa kukhala wosangalala. Gawo lachitatu la phunzirolo linasonyeza kuti kumverera kwachisangalalo sikudalira kuti munthu amene akuphunzirawo akufuna kuti akhale wosangalala. Panthawiyi, ochita kafukufuku adasonkhanitsa ndemanga kuchokera kwa omwe ochita nawo phunziroli adayesa kuchita chinthu chosangalatsa. Monga momwe zinakhalira, kukhutira kwa omwe adatenga nawo gawo sikudalira kwambiri momwe adakwanitsa kukondweretsa winayo, koma momwe iwo eni amawonera zotsatira.
"N'zotheka kuti malingaliro enieni ndi chikhalidwe cha chinthucho sizofunikira monga momwe wosewerayo amaonera," olembawo analemba. "Mwina kungoganiza kuti wina wapangitsa wina kukhala wosangalala ndikofunika kwambiri kuposa malingaliro enieni a chinthucho." Ofufuzawo analinso ndi chidwi ndi zomwe zimapangitsa anthu kukhala osangalala - zochita zawo kuti asangalatse ena, kapena kuyesa kwa wina kudzipangitsa kukhala osangalala. Ndondomekoyi inali yofanana ndi phunziro loyamba, koma tsopano otenga nawo mbali adayenera kukumbukira osati momwe adachitira chinachake kwa munthu wina, komanso momwe wina adawachitira zabwino - adayimba nyimbo yomwe ankaikonda, kuwaitanira ku chakudya chamadzulo, adawapanga kukhala chinthu chabwino kwa iwo. kampani yoyendetsa. Anthu ongodziperekawo anafotokoza zimene anachitazi ndipo anayamikira kuti zinali zosangalatsa. Pakuyesa komaliza, zidawonekeratu kuti kusamalira ena kumakupangitsani kukhala osangalala, ngakhale zitafika kwa anthu osawadziwa.
Ofufuza anaimitsa anthu mumsewu ndi kuwapatsa ndalama. Kwa ena a iwo, ofufuzawo adadzipereka kuti achite nawo kafukufuku wa ndalamazi ndikudzisungira ndalamazo, ena - kudzilipirira okha malo oimikapo magalimoto, ndi ena - kulipira malo oimikapo magalimoto a munthu wina ndipo, ngati angafune, asiya chikalata chofotokozera. zochita. Awo amene analipira malo oimikapo magalimoto a munthu wina ndi kukanena kwa mwini galimotoyo anali ndi malingaliro amphamvu achimwemwe poyerekezera ndi ena. Zinali zofooka pang’ono kwa amene analipira mlendo popanda kumusiyira kapepala. Kodi ndife okondwa kwambiri tili ndi zaka 60 kuposa zaka 30? "Mwinamwake kusiya cholembera kumatsimikizira kuti mlendoyo adzavomereza ntchito yabwino, yomwe ingakhale yofunika kwambiri pokwaniritsa kufunika kokhala pafupi ndi zochitika zoterezi," ofufuzawo analemba. "Koma n'zotheka kuti polemba kalatayi, otenga nawo mbali adapatsidwa mwayi wowonjezera wokondweretsa mlendoyo, kuwonjezera pa malo oimikapo magalimoto olipidwa - kotero iwo anali ndi mwayi wochita zinthu ziwiri zomwe zimabweretsa chisangalalo m'malo mwa chimodzi."
Mwachiwonekere, kufunikira kodzimva kukhala wolumikizana ndi ena ndikofunikira - kumafotokoza chifukwa chake kuchitira wina chinthu chinapangitsa otenga nawo gawo kukhala osangalala kuposa kudzipangira okha. Kuti mupeze zotsatira zolondola, zingakhale zothandiza kuphunzira momwe zotsatira zokhazikitsidwa zimagwirira ntchito mwa anthu awiriawiri, pamene onse awiri ali ndi mwayi wochita chinachake kuti asinthe maganizo a ena, ofufuzawo adanena. Zidzakhalanso zosangalatsa kudziwa zotsatira za nthawi yaitali zoyesa kukondweretsa ena ndi zotsatira za khalidwe lotere likakhala njira ya moyo.
